1.NIMMA E VARADA BHAVISHYA, MONDAY KAAMADALLI AASAKTHI, THUNNEYALI NISHAKTHI
THUSDAY THRUPTI AAGADA DAGAR NIMMA SAAMAN DAMAR, WEDNESDAY ANTINA GANTU CONDOM KITH BANTHU, THURSDAY KETTU HODA GENERATOR, BARUVUDU BARE WATER,
FRIDAY,MANCHADALLI AALINGANA, BF NALI BANDHANA, SATURDAY,SOOLEGE SAWALMELELADA SAMAN, SUNDAY, VIARAGYA PRAPTHI,GIRLFRIEND VAANTHI.
2.FIRSTNIGHTNALLI, HUDGA SEX START MADIDA, HUDUGI-TUMBA NOVAGUTHE,HUGDA-NIINU 10 ENSU,NANU NILSBIDTINI, HUDGI-12-AAA, 345-UFF,678-aAAH AAA 99987654
3.TEACHER BRA HAKIRILLA,MOLE THOTTU,KANISTITU,2 BOYS NODI NAGTAIDRU, TEACHER,KOPAGONDU,'ENNU NAGTHIRA?'IGRIGU ONDONDU KODTHINI NODI'"
4.TEACHER, NIMA CHARACTER CHENNAGIRABEKENDRE, YELLA HENNANNU AKKA THANGIRANTHE KANNABEKKU, STUDENT, ADRE, NAMMAPPA CHARACTER KEDOGUTHALLA.
5.SILENCE IS THE BEST WAY 2 AVOID MANY PROBLEMS.SMILE IS D POWER FULLTOOL 2 SOLVE MANY PROBLE,S, SO HAV SILENT SMILE.
Hey moon is bright and stars are shine, let them bless us, g n.
6.m/s shakila,officer I want a insurance police to my hole, Agent:Sorry,madam, no insurance to public used properties.
7.man, give me viagra extr dos, chemist: why man, 3 girls r comming to home, man, next day, give me iodes, chemist, what happen? man this is for my hand, the girls didnt come,
8.Happy birthday,hey don’t confus, day where tube light found by thomasalwa edsion, so am wishing all the tubes.
9.Everything n a girls upper body is start with B, like blouse bikini, bra, boobs, and lower with p,like panty , petticoat, pussy, now u know y men have BP
10.In it, and will do. He- did u ever cheat me? She, -I will die, than doing it, he-wil u kis meshe- yea sure its my pleasure,he-wuk y gyrt ne? she-no wy, am not such a kind of person. He-can I trust u? she- yes, he- oh dear to knw what happens after wedding, just read from bottom..
11.IMP tips of health, please don’t eat pizza samosa, sandwich, icecream, chocolate, halwa, with out me, gm.
12.HI, AM GETTING REGISTER MARRIAGE TOMORROW. SORRY TO INFORM THROUGH SMS. BECOZ HERE LOT OF PROBLEMS,I AM INVITING ONLY A FEW FRIENDS. SO PLZ COME TOMORROW AT REGISTER OFFICE, AT 10 AM , DONT BRING ANY GIFT, JUST BRING(5TIMES) ONE BEAUTIFUL GIRL.
13.NAANU TEA CUP NALLI TEA TORSITINI, NINU WORLD CUP NALLI WORLD THORITIYA, NAANU NIN MODILEGE NAN ADDRESS KALISTEENI, NEENU NAN ADRESSGE NIN MOBILE KALISTIYA.
14.BOY RAGING GIRL,GIRL ANGRLY,SAID;"CHAPPALI BHICHI HODARE KENNE UDKOBEKKU,
HUDGA ZIP BICHI HODARE HOTTE UDKOBEKKU ".
15. 4dogs fuking a female dog, cing this 1 lady strtd crying, a boy asks her,Y ur cryng, she replys, nthng, this just I remmbed my college days
16. ATTRACTION HAPPEND ANYTIME, LOVE HAPPENDS SUMTIME, MARRAGE HAPPENDS 1 TIME, FRIENDSHIP HAPPENDS, LIFE TIME.
17. Hudgiru plice na polisanna, anthare, conductor na conductoranna, driver na driveranna, k.e.b. avranna, ke baranna, hehe
18. KISS:K KUSHIYAGIRUVA , I INTRESTAGIRUVA, S SUNDARAVADA , S SMS
19. NINNU INDIA DA, DON, MATHU, HAGU, NAMMA DESHAVANNU KAYYO KEY, SO YOU ARE A DON KEY, DONKEY.
20. NODTA EDRE MUTTONA ANSUTHE, MURRIDRE AMKONA ANSUTHE, AMUKDRE CHIPPONA ANSUTHE, YAKANDRE, THISIS MANGO SEASON.
21 THALE KUDULU BEGA BILI AGUTHE, KELLAGINADIKKINTA, REASON, THALENALLI NURARU YOCHANE, KELLAGE ONDDE YOCHANNE,
22 Today is underwear day, tell me which color underwear u r waring today, no reply measn u r not wearing it, send it2 ur friends and see, how many are not wearing ,
23 Unbeatable lines, our body s fuly made of watr, but where ever it hurts, blood cumsout, bt our heart is made of blood, if it got hit, water cum fm eyes.
24 Failure is a single page, in a part of life, but success is a book f dictionary, don’t lose a full book just of single page.
25 Alphabetic, advice 4 u, Avoid Bad Company, Don’t Entertain fools, Go for Help, and Inspire just keep lovely,
26 Mukesh said to anil ambani, I want to kiss ur wife, anil, replied, ok but 40 paise per min. tina ambani shouted,don’t cheat him, reliance to reliance is free.
27 Sardar hair cutting shopna 1st floor ge shift madi board hakida, kelagina koodalu kattarisuva angadi mele idhe. S
28 Hudugi shirt mele 93.5fm, antha yithu, kelage maja madi
29 Govt of India, new rule, beautiful girls and handsom boys need to pay personality tax, don’t smile, I know you are thinking u r safe, oh god I ve to pay in billions.
30 Men, le senalle ibrigu sukha alva, gents matra yake rokka kodbeku, lady, namge incoming free, nimdu outgoing, adkke.
31 Feeling of love, moment of carling, small small sharing,chota chota fights, 2b 2gether in pains,creates,the miracles, called frnshp.
32 Kaayakave kailasa, keytha idre ullasa, keidamele ayasa, sikki bidre prayasa, saku thullu gala sahavasa, swamiji..
33 HUDUGI RAPE AAGIRUTTE, POLICE COMPLETE KODOKE HOGIRTHALI... HUDUGI, ":SIR, AVANUBHANDHU,SEER BICHI, BLOSE THAGDHU, BRA HARGHU,
NANN BALLS NA PRESS MAADI LANGA HARDHU, NAN CHADDI BICHHI, BEDDA BEDDA ANDRU KALLU ERADANNU AGLISI AVAN SAMANNA AMMKKI OLAGGU HORAGGU NUGSI BEDA BEDA NOVU ANDRU KELDE, NUGSI THEGADHU NUGSI THEGITHA NANA NIPPLES NA KACHI KACHI, THUTINA KACHI, RAP MADDHA SIR.
POLICE: NEE COMPLETE KODOKE BANGIYA, YEN NANN THUNNI NIGARSOKE BANDIYYA.
34 LADY:DOCTOR NAN MOLE THUMBA CHIKDIDE, dr: DAILY BAA MOLE CHEEPI DODADU MADTHINI, LADY, BArUVAGA GANDANANNU KARKONDU BARTHINI, AVRA SAMANU THUMBA CHIKDIDE
35 lady goes to doctor, says,doctor my breast are so small,what to do to make it big, doctor, you come regularly,will suck and make it big,lady: lady,then,will bringmy husband also wth me, doctor, why?? lady his dick is also too small, u can make his also big by blowing, good m,hugs
36 father,my 5yr old son is vey nughty, he made all our female maid pregnant,doct,how??he took a pin &punched holes on all my condoms.
37 FRIENDSHIP IS NTO HISTORY, TO FORGET, NOT MATHS TO CALCULATE , LANGUAGE TO LEARN ONLYCHEMISTRY THAT REACTS BETWEEN, 2 HEARTS
37b. absolutely amazing!! Beauty of mathematics, 1*8+1=9, 12*8+2=98, 123*8+3=987, 1234*8+4=9876, 12345*8+5=98765, 123456*8+6=985765, 1234567*8+7=9874561, 12345678*8+8=98765432, 123456789*8+9=987654321, 38 What is the name of a condom in Sanskrit,Thaila misritha vayumuktha yoni pravesaka shukla sambarana janana virodha veerya linga kavacham.
39 BABY FISH ASKED HERE MOTHER,WHY CONT WE GO ON EARTH, MOTHER REPLIED, EARTH IS NOT FOR FISH , BUT FOR ONLY SELFISH.
40 INDIAN STATISTICAL ASSOSCIATION SAYS THAT 42%OF GIRLS IN INDIA ARE READY FOR SEX B4 MARRIAGE, MY QUESTION IS**** WHERE ARE THESE GIRLS??
41 HOW TO IMPRESS A SWEEPER WOMAN, THU,, NAN MAKLA, KASA GUDISOLNU BIDALLA ANTIRALLO.
puttaa
KNPURA
42 . huvu mullu,novu nalivu, sihe kahi, bevu bella, happy ugadi, yr give u and ur family,al the wishes, prosperty,with ur lovable, let pray
43 Ponds add nallil mukha torsthare,lipstic add, lips, shampoo add nalli kudlu, wisper add nalli yak mosa, jago grahak jago??
44 Funny, fashion” lungi with a zip, laziness –askig lift for a morng walk, crainess, get black paper Xerox,
Northern trust SARJAPUR ROAD.
45 every thing of a girls upper body starts with B, blose, bra, and bottom, with p, pant, pussy, so men gets BP
46 fullform,of AIDS,A=AILLIYILLI SAMANAA,I=ITTADAKKE,D=DEVRUKOTA , S=SHAPA.
47 SARDAR FIXED HIS MARRIAGE ON 2ND AUGUST, HE SNT INVITTN TO HIS FRNDS LIKE THIS "MARIAGE IS ON 2ND, PLZ COME ON 1ST NIGHT, COM LETS ENJOY"
48 LUCK DECIDES WHOM U MEET IN THE LIFE,YR HEART DECIDES WHOM U WANT IN LIFE, BUT GOD DECIDES WHO GETS 2 STAY IN UR LIFE.
49 V R D EXPLORERS, CREATORES, SAVIOURS,WARRIORS,RULERS, WE R MEN.MEN DAY.11/21/09
50 MONKEY AND GIRLS BOTH ARE SAME, ALWAYS FIGHT FOR BANANAS, MEN AND RAT SAME, ALWAYS SEARCH FOR NEW HOLES.
51 boy am 20, U: Girl am also 20, Boy ten come to my bed room,Girl why??, boy lets play 20-20, game
52 swamiji thanna saaman thegdha, Girl:idu enu?
Swamiji, idu chikka swamiji, Girl: thanna saman thorisdlu, swamiji: idu enu? Girl,:chikkaswamijiya astram.
53 1 day morning sardar break fast ge idli madida. Wife:estu dhoda idli, hege madidri, sarar: e special batte yinda, wife: stupid give my bra.
54 Husband:I L U, U R MY LIFE WITH OUT U AM USELESS. WIFE:SUMMANE MASKA HODITIRA, YAKKA, LANGA YETHI SHURUMADI.
En: husb: I L U,ur my life, witout u am useless, my lolipss,Wife:Why waste pappering, lift my inner ware and start ur.
55 INVITATION: Drea frd, Mrs. Mr. sambar chatni inivts you for the wedding of their grandson masal dos, (s/o set dosa,with pani puri, (d/o bhel puri). In kichen, venue: ads: THAEIR VADA HALL,SAMOSA BUILDING,CHAPATHI ROAD, (OPP.NOODLES THEATRE) RASAGULLA NAGAR, BIYANI POST PALAV T.K., HALWA DIST., CHICKEN 65. GIFTS ARE MUST….
56 GIFL:bedakanoo novaguthe, boy thadko,solpa, mellane hakthini, gil,haa beda, boy sorry kane, vungura change madkondbarthini.
57 ALL Girls are beautiful, after the Lights are switched off, All boys are strong before sperms are let offk shaking sphere.
58 Read this sacry story, if you dare, On a rainy day an old man went with a book for sale, young man came and buy, He brought the book for Rs.3000,Old man advised”don’t open last page of the book, otherwise you”ll face a problem”.man finished the book with great fear but didn’t open the last page.. but after a week, out of curiousity, he opend the last page and .. He almost fainted, t see, RETAIL PRICE 30/-
59 Once again ur msg tone will ring & u look at ur cute phone. Expecting a msg fm som 1 special but so sad its juz dis old stupid frnd agin.
60 MODALU BICHABEKKU, AMELE, NETTAGE MADABEKKU, AMEL ENJIL SAVARABEKU,AMELE SARIYAGI OLGADE NUGGISBEKU, USSHAPPA, ESHT KASHTA ALWA SUUJIYOLGE DHARA SERISODU.
61 EVERY TEAR A SIGN OF COMITMENT, EVERY SILENT MOMENT IS A SIGN OF COMPROMISE, EVERY SMILE A SIGNOF ATTACHMENT, EACH SMS IS A SIGN OF REMEMBE
62 HI NIMAGE YAVAGLADRU DRUSTI AGIDYA, AGOLLA, YAKANDRE, NIMAGE KELAGADE ONDU MENASINAKAYI, 2 NIMBEHANNU KATIDE ADAKKE.
63 A BABY BOY AND A BABY GIRLIN A BATH ROOM, GIRL LOOKS AT DOWN D BOY AND ASKS HIM CAN I TOUCH IT? BOY NO WAY, YOU HAVE ALREADY BROKEN URS...
64 galileo stdied under smal lamp,graham bell stdided undr candle, sheksper stdied in street lite, alla ee nan maklu haglalli yen madthidru anta?
65 gay f9 rule, find him, follow him,friend him,french him,finger him, force him, fuck him, forget him, find another him,
66 here is a tricky question,4 guys,, suppose ur in a bed, sleeping b/w a beautiful gal and a gayguy, which side will u turn ur ass,to??
67 Husand,le monthy 1000rs, spending 4 condom, wife:spend 20 rs,nd llaminate yr tool na.
68 one love story, once one lover,invited me to her home, went, to her home but she was not there, her sister was there,she was sexy and asked for sex,guy walked toward my bike,watching all this, girl friend hugd him and said love u, and want to marry you, moral of story, never keep condom in pocket, but keep in bike.
69 hi can you do me a favor plz?can i get any 1 photo of yours, i need it , coz im working on a phot exibition on d topic,"mistakes of God"!
70 teacher-why ru rubbng oil on ur head while I am techng. stud-yest nght i heard that my mom was sayng to my dad,'rub the oil onthe head ifit isnt going in".
71 sms rate,1994-6rs,96-5,97-2,99-1,200150ps,2008-10ps 2009-almostfree,then why the kanjus.
72 why.
73 iduu, big banglore,99.9sex FM,Dengi Dengisi sukka nimadagisi, Hi nanu bindu,,tutu nandu saman nimdu, prayatna nimdu, fal namdu, omme tr madi idu sakkt hot maga
74 boy:nanu thengina mara hatti nodidre Engineering colleg hudgiru kantare gotha,
Girl:Hatid mele kai bit nodu,"medical college hudgiroo kantare.
75 shakila,next film:1,mole gulabi tullu jilebi, 2.mole mallige tullu holige, 3.mole mele bataini, thullu olage putani, 4.nekkabeku tullu adarolagide maalu.
76 rakshita mole, sunami ale, ramba thode, maslar wade, radhika tootu std bootu , shakilankundi, obavan kindi, ramya body, bajaj gadi, marimuthu thika,sms oduvavara muka.
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77 sex gu , vicks,gu, en diffrenece?ujkondi malgodu, malkondu ujjodu
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78 woman was having delivery pains, husband prayed "oh god, please make it loose for the baby, and then tight again for the daddy.
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79 america magu ge devaru taleli COMPUTERDHIP itta aa magu iga enginer aagide,India magu ge devru TENGINCHIP ITTA AA MAGU IGA MSG ODTIDE, HA ega nagtide
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80 monkeys and girls both R same bcoz they fight for bananas, and boys and rats are same,both in search of holes.
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pooraparambil amayum makalum, amma: mole sookshikanam, anungal orupadundakum. Aarenkilum ninte mulayil pidichal kumpalanga ennum,,, kundil pidichal mathanga ennum,,vayaril pidchal vazhuthananga, ennum paranju, sinal tharanam. kurachu kazhinjapol...makal: amme,,sambar
daughter and mom, mom: baby if somebody catch ur breast u say he catch my brinjal, then he catch dick u call watermelon, somebody taouch ur stomac u said some vegitable name, suddenly daughter ask so what meaning of sambar, mom shocked.
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81 A japanese doctor opend an hospital in karnataka, for piles,guess what twas the name of the clinic,ya-ko-thi-ka-no-va.
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82 athe sose, ottige snana madthare, sose athe saman nodi kayye mugithali, athe,yakke mugithidya, sose,edu,nana mavana yudha bhumi, nan gandana janmabhumi.
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83 school bell gu hudugi tull gu yenu samanate, yavadanna barsidaru aste,bharodu makkalu.
83.a : girl, do you love me, boy:ofcouse yes, girl: after marriage,boy:depends on ur husband, if he allow.
B: nimmage gotha ee namma deshadalli ennagide antha, ratri aagide
C: pennies is better than credit card,coz: accepted world wide, auto reload, no limit 2 use, no service charge, no pin no. no swipe, just wipe after use.
D: rich man to poor, how come ur pennies so big? Poor: because in my childhood I had no other toys to play.:
E: don’t take things in a wrong sense, when , doctor says take off ur clothers, dentist says open wide, interior deco says once its in u will love it, banker says if you take out soon u will loose interest, telephone guy says wud u like it on table or against d wall, team leader says push it guys.
=====================================================================================f: magic 4 u: ur cell number’s last 2 digit * 2+5,*50+ur age+365-615, ans: the last 2 no. is ur age and 1 st 2 no. is ur cell no. try it.
G: a hrudaya, heart dilla anthalla heltharalla, adhu left side of chest nalli iruthe kandri.
H: there are some shameless idiotic fools in this world who always reply “NO” to every question we ask, now u tell me r u such a person?.
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I: kelavaru nillisi hodithare, kelavaru baggisi hodithare, kelavaru joragi hodithare, en maadidhru hale bajaj scooter start madodhu thumba kasta kanri.
J: silence and smile are two powerful tools, smile is the way to solve many problems, silence is the way to avoid many problems.
K: what is re-cycling? Man giving used condom to his son to use as a balloon and after bursting, giving to his daughter t use as hair band.
L: a man had a sunburnt pennies, so he was advisd by a frnd 2 dip it in milk, while doin dat his gl frnd suddenly came &said,I always wonderd h u guys load dem.
M: true fact: never force urself to hav space inanyones life, bcoz if they really knw ur worth, dey’llsurely create 1 for u.
N: what is pure ayurvedic name for condom? Veerya rodhaka thailayukta janana virodhi linga kavacham, increase your general knowledge.
=
O: good night in commerce style, rest a/c DR. To tenstion a/c ( being comfort received and tension removed)
P: girl: I have done sex with 4 boys and u have done it with 6 girls, still every body calls me a slut, u a hero, boy: its simple, when a lock is opened by many keys, it becomes a bad lock, but when a key opens mnay locks, it becomes the master key.
Q: cheepu, innu channagi cheepu, innu poorthi baayi haaki cheepu, idhu maavina hannina kaala, happy mangoseason.
R: bed meladru maadi, sofada meladru maadi, chapeya meladru madi, roomanli adru maadi, carnaladru maadi, yelladru maadi,battebicci madi.:)
S:
84 wife:1 visya helidre hodibardu,,husbn :illa ,wife:i m pregnant, hus, good news, so why i beat you, wife:college nalli irwaga appana hatra heliddakke hoditidru.
85 any man can fuck hundred girls, but only a real boy can fuck a guy in 100 style,==============================================================================
85b. boy:nenu yestu ghante yedirthya,girl:whn ever I feel I sleep and wil wake up, kalli neenu ana samaan tharane .
86 teacher, hechhu baara horuva, kadime thuka yeruva vastu yavudu,student:nivu hakuva BRA madam.
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87 hi hw r u lov 2 meet u ny chance lv 2 kis, u all over,smooch u deep long suck u see u handle my hug ur naked tightlick. hmmm
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88 i really apprecit your brain which is dividd in to 2 part, on left nothing is right, and on right nothing left.
89 smoke daily, it is good for health, wait, smoke means,S:send,M:me,O:one,k:kool sms,e:daily,
=====================================================================================90 =SARDAR THIKDALLI GAAYA AGITTU, MIRROR ITKONDU CREAM HAKTIDDA, ASTRALLI AVANA SAMAN NIGRINILTU, ADAKKE, HELDA, LE BOSU-D-K IDU NANDE TIKA, SUMNE MALGU.
91 1 HUDGA DINA,BALEHANNU MARTHANE, 1 DAY,1 HUDGI LANGA MARROKE JAGADHALLI YIRTHALE, HUDGA BANDU, HEY HUDGI, NIN LANGA YETHU, NAN BALEHANNU YIDBEKKU.
92 Try madu try madu, let it try madu, adharalli sikkidhare, sikkisu, nandhu ondu meenu vodhadali, volage
93 14 boys decided to propose a girl,12 got rose, 1 got ring,(confidence), 1 got condom magandu yennu over confidence.
94 Ans madi!Huduga hudgi 18 varsha aadmele, yen madthare? Kedi,,, vote madthare, nodu
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95 Diff btwn six&sex, ball yethi mele hodedare adu six, ball othi kelage hodedare adu sex.
E: Diff btwn six &sex , if you shot up the ball, it is six, if you,shot down by pressing the ball,it is sex.
96 Girl asked dog, h cn u deliver so many puppies, tat 2 in so mny diff colors?dog says”try walking naked on road then u will know,
97 2 aspects of life , if we become too sentimental, it is too hard to lead life& if u become too practical,its too tough to respect Relation.
98 FILL IN THE BLANKS, 1.BOO_MS 2._ _NDOM? 3. F_ _K 4. P_N_S, 5. PU_S_ REPLY,
ANS,:1 BOOKS, 2 RAMDOM,3 FORK,4 PANTS, 5 PULSE MAY GOD BLESS DIRTY MIND
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99 ADD UR BTHDAY ATE 2 KNOW ABUOT UR ATTITUDE, EX, 18.10.1989, = 1+8+1+0+1+9+8+9=37,:3+7=10,:1+0=1 REPLY
100 1.SHARP MIND,2.SHORT TEMPER, 3.CRIMINAL,4.SIMPLE, 5.HALF LOOSE, 6.MENTAL,7.STRGHT FRWD,8.ACHIVIN MIND, 9.INTELLIGENT.
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1- Kal raat ko sun a tha ki 4 gundo ne aapki kanpatti pe bandook rake pucha goli marun, yaa band?? Aaj yeh jankar khushi hui ki aap zinda hog decision,
2- Some times special people come into ur life only to teach u how 2 live alone without dem, sad but true.
3-Watch a thots, will beum words, then word becom,action, action dey becum habit, habit into charcter.
4.dear frnds, plz don’t purchase pocket mil, bcoz it missed, D POISTIONS LIKE UREA, WASHING SODA ETC, IF INEVITABLE PURCHASE ONLY TRUSTED BRAND LIKE NANDINI.
5.FUCK IS THE ONLY WORD WHICH CA BE USED 2 EXPRESS MANY FEELINGS, Revenge-fuck u , Failure-am fuckd,Anxiety-what the fuck is hapnin Anger-get the fuck out of here, curious-hw the fuck did u do dat,Love- shez the fucking beaytuful, Lust-aah fuck me baby, Pride-im a fucking genius,Victory-I won dat fuckn competition, sad-y the fuck does dis happen to me, Confused-wht the fuck, by this time will be thinking what fucking grt8 mess,
6. girls can wear all the guys things, like shirt, pant . jean. ;imgine. Etc. but they cant wear 1 thing. GUESS? CONDOM,,, ITS MONOPLY. JAI JAWAN, JAI SAMAN.
San:hey bintu why u tell every one you are aids patiant,but u r a cancer patient rite, bintu,yea to safe guard my wife after my death.
Boy entered ladies toilet, Girl: idu mahileaigagi irodu rascal. Boy: opend his zip,said idenu masale kuttoka?idu kooda mahileyarigagi irodu.
Mobile Oscar Awards 2009:” “best SMS Sender2009 goes 2- cute boy :Narein” don’t put ur name,and sullu prachar madbedi, . heheheh
1098 CHILD HELPING COLLECT FOOD.
7. Boy kills butterfly, techr says no buter for you next 2weeks, he kills honey bee,tch says no honey for 2 weeks, maid kills cockroach, boy askd- u tel her or shud I?
8.History of april 1st, Aprild 1 is called as fool’s, day, after steve april. Steve April was born on 1st april 1579. He did 105 business in his life time. He lost all his fathr’s assets, Every one started calling him as father of the fools. At the age of 19 he married a 61aged woman.she divorced him after a year because of his foolishness. He used 2 hear all kind of fake stories like u. it’s a gret idea to fool U. Aril Fool.
9.dog fellin love with cat, dog parents refused cat. Guess ? they gave a solid reason?? Shit. Hudgige Meese Ide!!!
10.Guy Huged aunty after sex ,she askd why ddn’t u used condom, guy repls no swety it has written on cndom pack that Do not use if the seal is broken.
E: Guy Huged aunty after sex ,she askd why ddn’t u used condom, guy repls no swety it has written on cndom pack that Donot use if sealbroken
11. men’s sizes:9”&more-oh Fck im dead,8”-ah ah ah,7”-oh ya ,yes, 6”-perfect,5”-mm ok,4”-push more,3”-is it in?,2”-do u hav or nt, 1u r my brother
12. who r u? why u do sms? Who gave my number to you,? Don’t mess me, . did I told you , no na, then why didn t you mess me?,
13.police- why do u came 2 jail, santa: due to media lady,po:how, santa, it was written on her t-shirt, that “PRESS”, I pressed her front that’s it.
14.teachr: Y u laugh? Stud : I saw 1 strap of ur bra, T: get out of class fr 1 week, 2nd boy laughed, T: y u laugh, S:I saw 2 strap, T:get out of class fr 2 week, suddenly she bends down, 2 tak chalk,, little jony startd walking out , T: Jony, y r u goin out? J:I think my school days r ovr..miss
15.the worst thing in life is attachment it hurts when you lose it, he best thing in life is loneliness, sometimes it teaches u everything. Gm.
16.sorry, 4 nt smsing, actully polce arrested me 4 killng asmart sexy girl,I ddn’t kill,I just askd will u marryme, that crazy girl, kushise margayi.
17.shop girl: sir, no smoking in shop , customer, I purchased in your shop, shop girl:we sell condom also will you fuck here only.
18. Reply must, if u travel with me, what wil u choose?Auto,Car,Bike,Cycle, Walk, Bus, pls Reply
Auto:Sharing love. Car:time pass love,Bike :lovely love, cycle:true love, walk :life long love, Bus:sorrow love.
19.mens will have back, ladies hav front, what, what what is that, dirty mind, seat in bus.
20.life is like a fuck hole, its filled with pleasure and pain. Times like ass hole, what passes out, doestnt come back, marks r like booobs, it bounces up n down, lecturing r like blow jobs, dey suck d happiness, out of life, but friendship is a sex, life has no meaning without it.
21.men to therapist:Why do men always insist on marrying a VIRGIN? DOC:To avoid criticism about their performance.
22.Boy: if you are: sleeping, send dreams,cying send tears, reading sms send reply,girl :if am In toilet.
swamiji:ella hudgirannu thayiyate akathangiyaranthekaanu, gunda:ayithu nan samaan anna nim hatra itkondiri, s:why,G:gidamulike kuttoke agut
22B….a single sperm has 37.5MB of DNA inform in it, that means that a normal ejaculation of abt 6 million spern represnts a data transfer of continu down next
of 1,587.5 TB in abt 3 seconds. and you thought nothing was faster than google. proud to be a boy :) send tis to boys, great talaent. G8t energy.
23.pakistani farmaan:Ab Sania Bhbhi, vatan ki bahu hai,Tenis khelte waqt har unke ,Hips, sexy thighs, and bounind boobs ko izzat ke nigah sedekhe.
24.boss:let me fuck u once. I’ll quick &pay u 1000$.I’ll throw the money on the floor $b4 u bend down & pick it up all, I’ll done!. Secreatary likes the proposal and she calls her BF to ask, BF: its fine, but ask 2000$,& b very quick 2 pick the money. After 4 hours BF calls her BF: what happened? GF: Tht Bastard is still fucking me. He brought Coins! Lesson: Investments r subject 2 market risks. Please read the offer documents carefully b4 investing
25. son ask dad is urs love marrige,dad yes, ask how u know, son replies,when i calculate my birth day ur wedding date,it is only 6 months
26.varakkome jatka, mayyalla pulaka. Dinakkomme jatka, Kai kaalu naduka,, gategomme jatka mae munde dankanaka. Handle withcare.
When people hurt u, think of them as sandpapers. They rub and scratch u painfully, eventually u becom smooth and polished. They remain wornout n useless.
Fate s luk getting raped if u cant fight learn 2 enjoy it, work is lik a group sex 10 people r behind ur ass 2 take ur place, education s lyk hiring a prostitute , it needs both money and hard work, success s lyk masturbation. Only ur own hand can let u achieve it.
27.Wife:B gentle. Its my 1at time in bed. Husb:What? U hv been divorced thrice?. Wife:My 1st husbnd ws a Philospher, he oly talkd abt dis. 2nd ws Gyneaclogist, He jus kept luking at it, 3rd ws engineer, he needed a yr 2 design a new way 2 do it, ur a politician, so dis tym I knw am going to “FUCKED”.
28. 6"long,litle big,norml size black,maja in holding,who like to hold in hand,the new nokia,n-73mobile!!! :)
29. todays weathr,45c. plz keep ice cube inside ur underware, so the two eggs wont be amlet.
30.If we stand and do,wont be comfort, sit and do, wont be convient, laydown, and do the sleeping.
31. Banta goes to the local novelty shop and finds a pair of x-ray glasses. He checks them out, and isn't fully convinced, but as usual, the store assistant comes along and closes the deal.
On his way home, Banta puts on his new x-ray glasses and, bingo! He sees everyone in the street naked. He takes them off for a moment, and everyone has their clothes on. Puts the glasses back on... Everyone is naked! "Cool!"
As he arrives back home, he is eager to show his new toy to his wife, Preeto, but can't find her. He goes up to the bedroom and finds his wife and one of his colleague, naked in bed. He takes his glasses off, and the two are still naked. He puts them back on, and they are still naked.
Banta says, "Damn it, I just paid fifty bucks for it, aur saala kharab bhi ho gaya!!!! Made in China hoga.
32.Kick off”Penis Discomfort”., Shagg once in a week. Wash your penies every day, avoid black underwear in summer, take off ur underwear while sleeping, always cover ur penis completely when u r under the sun, this is a public service msg from hospital.. pass it 2 al guys with out hesitation.
Good
Manager asked sardar at an interview.
Can you spell a word that has more than 100 letters in it?
Sardar replyed: -P-O-S-T-B-O-X.
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Sardar:doctor plastic surgery modke estu karchu aagutee? Doctor:5 lakhs, sardar:if we bring plastic then??
Dream and aim both are sensational words, make your dream as aim, but don’t make your aim as dream.
Very imp msg: if ur alone and suddenly get chest pain, dat radiates 2 ur left arm, up 2 ur jaw, den it may be heart attack, if no one 2 help, and hospital is far, den don’t wait, u help urself, cough repeatedly, and vigorously tek deep breath, b4 every cough. Deep breath gets,oxygen 2 lungs, coughin keeps blood circulation alive.plz forward this as much as u can, one day ur mess may say a life.
Plz come to our home, once, for you coldrink, chicken biryani, matan biriyani, jamun, kabab, ice cream iro photo thoristini.
Destiny is simply the streangthof your desires,, if youcry at a trouble, it grows double, ifyou laugh at a trouble, it disapperars like a buble.
After returning back from a foreign trip, sardar asked his wife,
Do I look like a foreigner?
Wife: No! Why?
Sardar: In London a lady asked me Are you a foreigner?
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One tourist from U.S.A. asked Sardar:
Any great man born in this village???
Sardar: no sir, only small Babies!!!
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When sardar was traveling with his wife in an auto, the driver adjusted the mirror. Sardar shouted, "You are trying to see my wife? Sit behind. I will drive.
Interviewer: just imagine youare on the3rd floor, it caught fire
and how will you escape?
Sardar: its simple. I will stop my imagination!!!
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Sardar: My mobile bill how much?
Call centre girl: sir, just dial 123to know current bill status
Sardar: Stupid, not CURRENT BILL my MOBILE BILL
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Sardar: I think that girl is deaf..
Friend: How do u know?
Sardar: I told I Love her, but she said her chappals are new
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Friend: I got a brand new Ford IKON for my wife!
Sardar: Wow!!! That's an unbelievable exchange offer!!!
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Teacher: Which is the oldest animal in world?
Sardar: ZEBRA
Teacher: How?
Sardar: Bcoz it is Black & White
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Sardar attending an interview in Software Company.
Manager: Do U know MS Office?
Sardar: If U give me the address I will go there sir.
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Sardar in plane going 2 Bombay .. While its landing he shouted: " Bombay .. Bombay "
Air hostess said: "B silent."
Sardar:"Ok.Ombay.Ombay "
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Teacher: "What is common between JESUS, KRISHNA , RAM, GANDHI and BUDHA?"
Sardar: "All are born on government holidays....!!
Sardar: Miss, Do u called 2 my mobile?
Teacher: Me? No, why?
Sardar: Yesterday I saw in my mobile- 1 Miss Call".
===(Had never thought of it)
==============================================
Sir: What is difference between Orange and Apple?
Sardar: Color of Orange is orange, but color of Apple is not APPLE
All beautiful things start from the heart and all bad things start from the mind, so don’t let mind to rule your heart, let heart rule the mind.
Always fight with your strength, but not with others weakness because true success is only of your efforts not in others defeat.
7-coffee, 9 -tiffin, 11-juice, 2- lunch, 4-tea, 6 –snaks,9-dinner, you know how to have eating, but forget messaging your friends,
><((((:> <:))))>< this is my friend ship fish, please keep care, so keep fish alive keep your mobile in water,
Husband, our daughter might got a boy friend, wife,- how?, husband,-coz she is nto asking pocket money these days.
/ / I ( THE MOST WAST DY,WHEN I DIDN’T LAUGH.
;c(,,,) .c )
PEACE-WHITE,POWER-RED, KNOWLEDGE-YELLOW, DEVELP-GREEN, LOVE-PNK,SUCCESS-BLUE,
Think –“Gently” Talk “simply” Laugh “Loudly” Work “Smartly” Love “sincerely” Read “Slowly”remember me Daily,Enjoy the day>
I pray for u, A life that U truly deserve,, A life as good as ur heart,, A life as bright as ur smile & a life as wonderful as You are.
Mango,Orange,Banana,Grapes, & Apple,, which is sweet, Guess! Don’t know? Good ness, nothing sweet, all are fruits,but u r sweet:
Imp health tips, Answer the phne by left ear. Don’t take medicine with cold water, don’t have heavy meals after 5 Pm. Drink morewater in the morning, less at night , best sleep btwn 10-4 am,dnt lie down immedialy once you take medicine,when battery of mobile is down to last bar, don’t answer the phone, as the radiation is 1000 times more. Forward this to ur belived once
Always take extra care of 3 things in your life,!.Trust@promise#andRelation, because they don’t make noise, when they break ,,but it hut a lot. Good relations don’t need any prmises, tens or cnitions, it just needs two wonderful people ,one who can trust, and one who an understand.
To become successful in life, u shuld make 3 factories, 1.Ice factory in ur brain,2.sugar factory in ur tongue,3.steel factory in your heart.
Getting a frnd is easy, choosing a frnd is difficult,maintaining the frndshp is talent,continuing th efrndhip is grt gift.
When it wz don at the age of 15 blood came 2nd time, pained, 3rd time burnt, 4th tme really feel smooth,then,what hppndd,knwn shaving style
lady-y ths tiny hndbag cost so?shpkepr:its mde of penis skin,whn ny lady,touches,it becom a suitcase>
unga akka anna thambi thangachi appa amma, chithapa, chithi, periyamma periyappa, thatha patti mama athai anni machan maplae,machinachi nathanar, kolundanar kolundiyal pullakutti peran pethi kolluthatha, kollupatti kolluperan kollupethi ellorkkum and ngalukkum advance deepvali wishs.
Never ask for a smile, just give it, never expect love from others just love them. Never say I cont live with out you, just say I live for you. Never be late, don’t cheat, live simple, except little,work more, always smile, have faith in god. One day 24hours, 14400 minits, 864000 seconds,..
Ninnindalle,, Ninnindalle,, Ninnindalle,,Ninnindalle,,kari naayi mari haakide, chi kalla, khushi nodu,..
Hey plz don’t go out of ur home it is danger 4 u, coz 4 bakrid, they r catching all bakras. S I don’t want to lose u. ……
8 qualities 2 b a perfect husband. Brave, intelligent,gentle, polite, energetic, non alcoholic, industrious, self organized, in short B.I.G.P.E.N.I.S.
may god paint the canvas of ur life with the most betifl colors prink peac,luck, suces and joy with u colorful happy holi. darling hug kissu
8 qultes 2 b a perfect hsband. Brave, intellgent,gntle, polite, enrgetic, non alcoholic, industrious, self organized, in short B.I.G.PENIS.
Most people have 5 senses. Some people have 6 senses. But u r blessed with 7 senses. An extra sense is NON SENSE.
